What Elvis and Dwight Yoakam Say About Suspicious Minds

Music heals the soul, energizes the body and even fires up the passion machine.  Music is always there when we need some direction and ESPECIALLY when we need a lift. It helps us through our relationship ups and downs, and it can be one of our biggest teachers of life lessons.  (Am I the only one who learned the alphabet from a Captain, how to score with the ladies from guy named Meatloaf and maybe even some light algebra from a large yellow bird?  I think not!)

 

For many of us, it seems the timing of a certain song being played on the radio is always perfect.  It never fails — popular music somehow reflects our current situation by creating the soundtrack of our lives during each distinct life phase.  For me, the band Kiss taught me what I needed to know about life as a teenage juvenile delinquent.

What Elvis and Dwight Yoakam Say About Suspicious Minds
What Elvis and Dwight Yoakam Say About Suspicious Minds

My stretched out Styx eight tracks turned me on to living life more intellectually.  After graduation, the Prince cassette always playing in the background showed me that if I wanted happiness, I’d need to live life with passion.  Whether it was Depeche Mode or the Nine Inch Nails, my collection of CDs has helped me enjoy my life AND that collection helped me exorcise my demons when necessary.

 

“Suspicious Minds” was Elvis Presley’s last number 1 song before he died.  The song was written by singer/songwriter Mark James in 1968.  I’ll admit I knew this song because of The King, but I really took a liking to it after Dwight Yoakam covered it in 1992.

 

Not only do I love the music, but I especially love the lyrics.  Have you listened to these lyrics lately? In my business of life coaching, I hear a lot of relationship issues that stem from the issue raised in this song.

 

There is SO MUCH we each can gain from this song if we allow ourselves to really listen to it.  It doesn’t hurt to feel the passion and pain of the lyrics, either.  So…click on the link for “Suspicious Minds” below, sit back, relax and let’s break it down.

“Suspicious Minds”

 We’re caught in a trap

I can’t walk out

Because I love you too much baby

 

Are you feeling trapped in a relationship because your heart and mind are in different places?  Can you feel the dysfunction in the relationship, but are you too afraid to really admit it?  When your brain says this isn’t how things are supposed to be, but your heart fears losing the love and life this relationship has created, your conundrum has begun.  We’ve all been there.

 

Why can’t you see

What you’re doing to me

When you don’t believe a word I say?

We can’t go on together

With suspicious minds

And we can’t build our dreams

On suspicious minds

 

Insecurity.  The death of so many relationships.  What a fantastic realization by Mark James.

 

If either you or your partner has insecurity issues, your relationship will be rocky at best.  It will be a high conflict relationship at worst. Insecurity is a fire starter that was probably in place even before the relationship began (quite possibly from previous relationship misfires that you or the other person have never resolved).  You or your partner might need to revisit those past experiences with a professional to end the recurring feelings of anxiety caused by insecurity.

 

In some cases, though, no amount of groveling, counseling or time will help.  You or your partner might be forced to sleep in the bed that’s been made.  In other words, an indiscretion on your part may have had a hand in your partner’s insecurity issue (or vice versa).  At that point, if you’ve genuinely done what you can to make things better, it is up to the “victim” to stop reliving the pain.  If forgiving the indiscretion can never happen by the person who was “wronged”, your relationship is in for a huge roller coaster ride.  A re-evaluation might be in order.

 

So, if an old friend I know

Drops by to say hello

Would I still see suspicion in your eyes?

Here we go again

Asking where I’ve been

You can’t see these tears are real

I’m crying

 

Trust.  This is the biggest asset to any relationship.  For a relationship to be successful, you must trust in yourself and in your partner.

 

I’ve never been a believer in the adage love takes work.  That’s not love that’s work…  I believe love takes love. Trust is another form of love, and it is a necessity to any good relationship.

 

Trust can be earned, broken and rebuilt, but only if both parties recognize and forgive.  Insecurity can tear down the strongest of homes.  Beginning a relationship with a partner who is already insecure about the relationship or who is insecure about him or herself is like building a house of cards and waiting for a storm.

 

We can’t go on together

With suspicious minds

And we can’t build our dreams

On suspicious minds

Oh let our love survive

Or dry the tears from your eyes

Let’s don’t let a good thing die

When honey, you know

I’ve never lied to you

Mmm yeah, yeah

 

Mmm, yeah, yeah indeed, Dwight. In–deed.

 

Do you have a soundtrack to your life?

 

I’d love to hear about it. Drop me a note.

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