Why You Should Say Yes
Wendy’s a “yes woman.”
No one has ever said this about me…ever.
In fact, my default setting is to automatically say “no” to all questions that are presented to me before I even think.
The other day I was on my way home from divorce court in East Mesa. I was stuck in traffic and frustrated. I decided to do something I haven’t done in a while (because my commute from my home to my office is less than 5 minutes…walking). I turned on my radio. Not just that, but I tuned my radio in to a country station.
If you don’t know me that well, you don’t know I’m a country girl at heart. I grew up in a country town with cowboys and horses and parents who listened to Johnny Cash and Loretta Lynn.
My best summer memories are of us singing along with the radio, windows and doors open and Barbara Mandrell chirping in the background about eating crackers in bed.
We danced. We played. We sang.
We said yes to our lives.
And…I think…because of this, we were happy.
Since I’ve become an adult, I’ve noticed life can feel really grueling at times. There are mean people in the world. I come into contact with them. They make me miserable.
The cost of living seems really high. Although I’m a lawyer, I still work my behind off to feel like I’m only barely making ends meet. Just when I get ahead, something “big” happens like my water hearing blowing or my needing new tires.
Ugh. Is it possible to ever get ahead?
Sometimes I wake up angry, and I have no idea why. I take it out on my husband or my assistant, and then they get angry with the world, too. We all devolve into an ugly, crabby, nasty downward spiral.
Last night I was on edge because it took me an hour and a half to get my daughter to go to sleep. After spending my whole evening coaxing her between complaints of being hungry, having to “go potty,” and wanting me to read 14 stories to her, she finally drifted off. By that point, it was after 10. I was ready for bed.
I filled up the glass of water that normally sits on my nightstand. I climbed into my comfortable, cool bed. Wait! I remembered I forgot to set my alarm. I reached over to push the button and…I knocked my water over shattering the glass in to a million shards all over my bedroom floor.
Anyway…back to being stuck in traffic. On that particular day, I needed to listen to something that would distract me from the fact that I was really PO’d it had taken me 15 minutes to drive half a mile. When I turned on KNIX, I thought I would get the normal songs about drinking on the beach, crying in your beer and tequila making a woman’s clothes fall off.
Instead, I got something completely different.
I got several deep-voiced and good-looking country “newbies” who reminded me how much of a “no girl” I am. They gave me some of the best advice I’ve ever had. They told me to turn up the radio and Play It Again. They told me I should sing. They told me A Better Life is possible.
They told me to say yes.
When life isn’t going the way I want to, I think it’s because I’m fighting it. I’m trying to swim upstream. I’m saying “NO! I don’t want what you have to give me.”
I believe, think and know, however, whatever it is we “are getting” in life is a gift. It’s just a matter of us learning to say yes – “Gimme what you got!” It’s about doing a little improv (by saying “yes, and…”) in the real world.
No. It’s not easy to say yes to life when you’re filing for bankruptcy, getting fired or going through a divorce. It does take practice to keep your eyes open so you can see the gifts being presented to you through every experience.
Your life will become magical when you start to say yes. You will encounter people and things that will bless you beyond your wildest dreams. Do you want to go there?
Start by doing one of the following:
1. On a daily basis, give thanks for no less than five things that are good in your life.
2. Make a promise to yourself to not bitch, complain or gossip for one week straight. See what happens.
3. Do something kind for another person “just because.”
4. Turn on some music, turn it up loud and sing.
5. Eat crackers (or cookies) in bed no less than once per week.
5. Before you say “no” to someone or something, stop. Don’t do anything just yet. Wait. Wait. Ok…now.