My Big Relocation Decision

Today, for the first time, I am “coming out” with some never-before shared information.  This revelation will come as a surprise to most and may even upset some of you.  Don’t freak out just yet because we haven’t made up our minds, but…


James and I are considering whether a relocation may be in our family’s best interest.


Let me explain.


When Paloma was born two years ago, she rocked our world. At the same time, she turned it upside down.  In spite of the fact he has two grown children, not even James imagined how a new baby would change things for him (us).


For one thing, neither of us imagined that more than two years after Paloma’s birth, our queen-sized bed would go from sleeping two to sleeping six.  You heard me right: SIX!  In addition to me and James, Paloma now sleeps in our bed along with a stuffed chihuahua named “Puppy”, a Shamu doll she calls “Fish”, and a single Lightning McQueen slipper.

Where is Paloma going to be moving?

Despite the limited amount of room in bed, Paloma prefers to sleep with her body horizontal to mine and James’.   Several times a night, I scoop her up and gently rotate her, laying her sweet little face on the pillow.  Without fail, not long after: BAM! I’m jolted awake by a karate toe kick to my stomach, chest or face.


At least her prospects for a career in the martial arts are promising (which really pleases James, a huge Ronda Rousey fan).


Our pediatrician recently chastised us for letting Paloma drink out of sippy cups. The time has come, he told us, for her to drink out of “big girl” cups.  What this means on a practical level is this: no sippy cup in bed.  What THAT translates to is us being woken up two to three times per night by her little voice chanting “Water.  Water.  Water.”


I’m so happy she asks for what she wants.


Once Paloma’s thirst is quenched, she must get back to sleep.  Fortunately for us, she shows us exactly how we can help her do this.  It’s impossible to be mad when you feel Paloma’s tiny little hand grab yours and place it on her back, arm, tummy, or leg, then move it back and forth in the caressing motion she knows will lull her to dreamland.


A natural born leader.  Yes!


There are a lot of things I love about Paloma sleeping with us.  Her nighttime hugs and kisses.  Watching her peaceful face.  Hearing her breathe.


What I don’t like?  Feeling exhausted every morning.  Waking up with a new bruise each day.  Not being able to cuddle with my husband.


It is because of these things that we are considering relocation.  Of Paloma.  To her own bed.


Ouch.  Just the thought of moving her to the next room over makes me ache inside.  For me AND for her.  Can you imagine what we will go through if we decide to make the move soon?


I sympathize with those parents facing a relocation decision which involves moving a child to another state or country.  On top of being excruciating for parents, relocation cases are some of the most difficult for lawyers to handle and for judges to decide.  In considering whether a relocation would be in your family’s best interest, there is one thing you must do:  read the Hernandez Family Law blog on SAYING SAYONARA! AZ’s Rules on Relocation.


Once you’ve read the blog, leave us a comment here and tell us the things you think are most important when deciding whether a child should be relocated.


As for us? Regardless of what Drs. Spock and Sears might say, our co-sleeping arrangement has been a good thing.  By observing Paloma’s nighttime patterns, I am reassured she is destined to be a strong, assertive leader.  I also know that if we don’t move her sooner, there will come a point when she will tell us she wants to sleep in her own bed.


Either way, her Dad and I will be heartbroken.


Either way, all of us will be OK.


Sending you wishes for a week in which you move onward and ahead!


All my best,



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