What to Do When Life Gets Cray Cray
Sometimes life gets cray cray.
<In case you’re wondering, according to the Urban Dictionary, “cray cray” is “a desperate attempt to say ‘crazy’ made by some adult attempting to be cool.”>
Annnnd….That adult would be me.
Anyway. Getting back to life being crazy. It happens, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. You can only roll with it…
<Or not…And even if you don’t roll with it, the crazy is going to happen anyway. Why fight it?>
Chances are when you were in school, you learned something about homeostasis. In very non-technical terms, homeostasis is the notion that a system is stable, regulated, and constant. In other words, things are operating on cruise control.
In my experience, we all go through periods of calm. Then we go through periods of crazy. Then we get back to calm again. But wait…just when we are feeling cozy and comfortable with life, things go nutty.
This is The Law.
Doesn’t life feel great when you are living on autopilot? You click through every day, singing along with the radio, and it seems as though everything is as it should be. You might have small obstacles, issues and challenges, but nothing that interferes with your ability to enjoy sleeping in on a Saturday morning or Monday Night Football.
Life is puppies and butterflies.
In some cases, you can go on for years like this and then one day…
Change smacks you in the kisser. You find yourself in a state of upheaval and crisis. You are freaking out. You are afraid. You want homeostasis restored because everything in your life has become…
The good thing about this craziness is that balance will be restored once again…someday. It is the law (of physics or of biology or of something). Eventually, things will go back to a “new normal,” and you will get back to living on autopilot.
You will feel happy. And stable. And secure.
But…before you can get back to where you think you want to be, you have to get through the upset and imbalance you are feeling in the moment. If you are anything like me, your first instinct will be to fight the change. You will want things to go back to the way they were.
Don’t do it!
Maybe the “old” way of doing things, the “balanced” way, isn’t really the best way for you anymore. Maybe it’s possible that you can live bigger and be happier, but it requires you stepping out of (or being forced out of) your comfort zone. Maybe, in the midst of this upheaval, you make an intentional choice to float downstream, rather than fighting the current.
Strap yourself in, hang onto the side, and enjoy the ride. It’s taking you somewhere better. In the meantime, remember to do the following:
1. Look towards the future with curiosity and wonder.
You have a choice about how you are going to approach this new way of living we call cray cray. Will you resist it, hate it and curse it? If so, how do you think this will make you feel?
Do you think it might feel better to approach the craziness with an attitude of “bring it on!” Can you look your fear in the eye and say “let’s do this.” Can you wake up with excitement about the twists and turns each new day will bring?
Open your front door when crazy comes-a-knocking. Invite it in. Sit with it and try to understand what it’s trying to teach you.
2. Give yourself a break.
How long have you been doing the same old thing over and over and over? Have you ever considered that crazy has happened because the same old thing just isn’t working anymore? Are you willing to give the the tried and true a break and do something new?
Cut yourself some slack. Allow yourself to relax from habit, routine and tradition. Ask yourself what you really need, then listen to your inner voice. Be willing to say “no” to that which is comfortable but no longer serves you. Be willing to say “yes” to something that is out of your comfort zone, but feels sooooo good…
<like sleeping in for a change>
3. Work harder than normal.
Change always gives you a kick in the pants you probably weren’t expecting. What is the change trying to tell you? Maybe you need to work harder than normal at a variety of things like…
Loving and accepting yourself.
Don’t let all this upheaval go to waste. Use crazy as an opportunity to dig deep. Do some work.
Get better. Do better. Be better.
The world wants you to step into the fullness of who you really are.
4. Take more risks.
What the hell.
Things are crazy already. You’re already uncertain and afraid. Why not throw a little more into the mix?
Do something you’ve always wanted to do. Get out of that comfort zone (which is really a danger zone). Walk to the edge of the mile high diving board and JUMP.
Get enough crazy in to last you for a — Good. Long. Time.
5. Allow action to meet faith.
During times of cray cray, people always say to have faith. They say to trust. They say everything happens for a reason.
All of this is probably true. However, nobody is going to save you but you. You can sit there and wallow in your sorrow for a while, but don’t do it for too long.
You have stuff to do! This is your life. What are you going to do to make it happen as you want?
Come up with a plan. Make some goals. Write some s*** down.
6. Expect the very best.
You can expect the worst or…
You can expect the best.
Why would anyone look forward to and plan for nothing but the worst?
I don’t know, either, but for some reason, planning for the worst seems to be our default. While it doesn’t hurt to be a Boy Scout (be prepared), there’s a difference between that and expecting the absolute worst possible thing to happen every time crazy happens.
Think about this: expecting the best is just as easy as expecting the worst. And…the upside is that the more you focus on the good…the happy…the best…
The more you increase your chances of making that dream happen.
It can really suck.
There is a gift in the crazy, though.
Open your eyes. Look for the gift. It’s there.
Your life is unfolding as it should.
Your life is amazing.
So are you.